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RAWRBDAY
In addition to the Rawrbday webcast, my cousin sent me this video.
Hurray!
%BLOG-IMAGES%Facepunchingly Good Advice.
Even more! I've been back and forth here going from working on band stuff and other web stuff. Then there's Oblivion. Meh!
Question!
hey you seem like a really down to earth dude. and ive grown to appreciate your (sexy) band more and more. you have really helped out my friend, whos like a little brother to me. i was wondering if you could help me out with something. you see im getting really pissed off on how he is geting treated. he says he doesnt care, but he doesnt deserve the shit that he gets. personally im pissed at the fucks who do do this to him. i do know its not my personal buisness, but i guess im just defensive. also last but not least i think this girl from work is into me, she just broke up with her boyfriend, and she seems to like to get close to me. shes cute and all, but girls are freaking confusing as a bisexual. please help me.
Hell yeah we're a sexy band. I'll make sure I pass that along to the guys. Yeeeah.
I understand that you might feel responsible for your buddy's well being with your circle of friends. Truth be told there's not a whole lot you CAN do. At times when he's having a rough time, just make sure you're supportive of him. Eventually he will stand on his own two feet and remove those people from his life. Just don't be one of those people, which I don't think you will be. Good friends are hard to find and it sounds like you're a good one. He will eventually stand up for himself, so just be there to get his back.
So you're confused as to whether this girl from work is into you or not? I tell you I used to be BAD at picking up on signals. Ironically enough I would find out much later after the said female found a new fling after giving up on me. No fun.
Things to look for:
- When talking, any time she touches you she's flirting with you. For instance if you tell her a joke and she laughs while touching your arm, that's a huge signal.
- When you're talking to her watch her eyes. If she maintains eye contact and looks at your mouth and back up to your eyes while you talk, that's another signal. It's very subtle but big.
- Eye contact is a fun one. For example, say you're across the room and you look at her and she looks back. When she looks away (and she will), don't break your eye contact. If she looks back and smiles or whatever, that's another good sign. This last one is a tricky one and some guys are afraid to try it since they'll be worried that it's "staring" or "creepy."
- Body language. This one can be tricky. If she leans towards you when you talk, that's another signal. If she bites her lower lip while smiling at you, that's a BIIIIIG one. There's tons more, but most of it is intuitive. I would recommend watching some movies where there's flirting and courting going on between a male and female. WATCH what the chick does when she's showing interest in the guy. It'll become very obvious once you understand.
Also, chicks do not normally make the first move. They generally do not ask you out on a date, nor will they move in for that first kiss. They will almost always be super subtle in their interests. They'll THINK they're being obvious, but from your perspective you really have to pay attention.
It does sound like this chick is interested. Test her a few more times and pay attention to the signals. Then make your move if you're interested. You move can include just asking her out or, when the timing is right (NOT at work), moving in for some sloppy face melding. Some call it kissing, but whatever.
Here's another question! I'm all, knowledgefacedguy.
Question: I've liked this one girl since we were freshmen. She's been through a couple relationships between then...but nothing serious. Now it's my senior year, and still haven't gone out with anyone yet. I'm planning on asking her out. Now it gets confusing. Her best friend, also a friend of mine just got out of a relationship with a complete ahole. She's all the sudden starting to talk to me a whole lot more. Oh, another thing that might not help also. My best friend likes girl #2, and he just got out of a relationship. Here are the options:
1. Continue with Girl #1.
2. Switch for Girl #2.
3. Look elsewhere, and just keep them friends
4. Explode.
I had to read that a few times to make sure I understand your dilemma.
I don't know if you're asking me to decide for you or not, but I really don't know much about these two. Sounds like you're very interested in girl #1 and a little interested in girl #2, so I would ask #1 first. Then explode. You can have #1 and #4 at the same time!
Good luck to ya!
%BLOG-IMAGES%I Should Get Paid for This.
More questions! Man, if I got paid for this, I'd have at least 20 bucks! Yeah. I could buy stuff like 50 tacos at Del Taco on Taco Tuesdays! Woa.
Here's the question:
Friends:
I dont know why, but ive always felt like a third wheel when it comes to hanging out with people. the only thing i can figure is that i have guess what you can call a soft personality, dont swear, quiet, ya know stuff like that. What should i do?
This may be a little more difficult
Last year, i became friends with this girl. i thought she was pretty chill so i asked her if she wanted to hang out. SUCCESS!. Every friday, my brother, his friend and mine that girl and i would all go to the mall and experience crazy shinaniganz. Sooner or later, i started to like her more than a friend. she found out and didnt really care. as soon as summer hit, our friend ship had really drifted away bigtime, but we still keep in touch. Over time, my friend and her have gotten to be closer friends and ive been kicked out of the picture. The creepy thing is that he is 3 years older than her, EWWW.
Girls are freaking confusing, ARG! what can i do?
I think I know what you mean by third wheel. I believe that feeling "like a 3rd wheel" isn't a bad thing, maybe you have a unique approach on things that people sometimes don't understand? I had a group of friends when I was way younger that I didn't relate to that well, and often I felt so different from them. Eventually I did meet some people that I did relate to more and ended up starting a dumb band with one of them. :P
The message here is that no matter HOW you feel, 3rd wheel or whatever, just be your own unique self and things will fall into place naturally.
The same thing applies to girls. The female gender can be extremely confusing because we think, "She's giving me signals and we have fun together, but why doesn't she feel the same way I do?" Oh the contradictions. Oh the backasswards logic. It's all there. Nothing is as it seems when it comes to chicks. NOTHING. You might hear her say one thing, but she really FEELS the exact opposite. It's mind boggling and has been driving men crazy for thousands upon thousands of years. Lucky for you you've got a brain and can figure this out. It's really simple when you stop overthinking it and just use your judgment and intuition.
First things first with this girl - it's too late. Sorry. It sucks, but it's too late. Time to cut your losses and move on. Your window of opportunity left you a while back. It's ok. This happens to all guys at some point. Matter of fact, many of us brainy quiet types get hit with the friend zone all the time. The best thing to do right now is to stay friends with her.
Not what you wanted to hear? Yeah I know. Trust me though, it'll make more sense as time goes by. It's essential for all males to have female friends. Keep her as your friend and be genuine about it. This shows that not only do you want her as your friend, you want to KEEP it that way. Keep doing those things that you always did. Stay in her friend zone. Actually you don't have a choice - you're already there, so that's no problem. :P
This also shows that you're over that whole crush you had on her and that could POSSIBLY become strangely attractive to her later, but don't count on that one bit.
Now why is it so important to have female friends?
When you're dating, having a healthy circle of friends is extremely attractive. Now don't run out and get a circle of friends JUST to get laid or meet chicks - that's against the guy code. You'll get asked to hand in your "Awesome Guy Card" immediately. You'll have your awesome circle of friends to be there to support you as you would them. Friends are far more valuable than any romantic relationship you'll get in. Some may disagree with me. If you lose your girlfriend, you'll always have your friends. Romantic relationships aren't nearly as stable and reliable as your buddies, even the female ones. Just remember that.
Fuck, I'm getting a bit off subject. Har har stupid coffee.
Chicks are inherently confusing, but it's even more of a battle if you don't understand yourself. Heh, if you can't understand how you operate how on earth can you understand others? Sounds crazy I know, but it's really a great place to start to get all of this figured out.
That's pretty much the first step. Beyond that is nitpicking on stuff like body language, eye contact, flirting, etc. That's a whole other topic for another time. :p
So in a nutshell just relax, be yourself, pursue the stuff that makes you happy, and you'll be ready when your quintessential female comes walking into your life. If she's not here yet, you're not ready for her.
Wow I impress myself. *flex*
%BLOG-IMAGES%Shattered Heart Tacos!
Got another question. One would think I know something about stuff! Wait, what?
Here.
ok here is my situation....
there is this guy he is four and a half years older than me but we hit it off really well. he isnt my actual boyfriend but he trusts me and i want to trust him. i love him.
well he is in arkansas doing some training to go to iraq in january. well he went to go meet this girl, and he is going to stay with her for the weekend. he promised me that he wasnt going to do anything but i know that most guys....well the guys that ive been with would do it seen as its there.
should i be worried that he will do things and not tell me?
i want to believe and trust his every word but i dont know if i can.
please give me advice...
- L
For starters, a 4.5 year age difference is just fine. It might be weird if he was 18 and you were 14, but your situation is legal so it's cool. Hell, I turn 28 this month and my last girlfriend was 5 years younger than me. Go me, eh?
Anyway. He's off training and about to leave the country for a while, so your situation just got complicated. This is where trust and communication will become the two single most important factors between you two
I think it's natural to worry about his faithfulness to you. However from a guy's perspective, it's incredibly annoying when we get stereotyped as liars and cheaters. You're probably not accusing him (at least I hope not), but it's easy to imply that you're secretly jealous and might not trust him. Let's look at a couple of facts:
- Men interact with women every day (unless World of Warcraft rules your life with an iron doom hammer).
- Men have female friends (well, the healthy ones :).
- Men might even have female friends who you might think are prettier than you are.
- Men could also still be good friends with ex-girlfriends whom might even share a complicated history together.
Trusting him while he's out there really depends on his personality and if he appreciates you. It's hard for me to say, "Yeah, trust him!" I just don't know the guy. If he hasn't given you any reason not to trust him, then I wouldn't worry about it.
The BEST way, in my experience, is to just support him. Encourage his social life. "You're hanging with Sally? Ok, have fun! Call me later, ok?" This establishes in many, many subtle ways you trust him and have faith in his fidelity.
And be GENUINE about it. If he asks, "You trust me, right?" The answer is, "Yes I do. Why shouldn't I?"
However, the only thing I'm not sure about is how you mentioned he's not actually your boyfriend. Hmmm. That's peculiar to me. The above advice really applies if you're committed to each other, but if you're not you really ought to find out where you stand with the guy. If he's standoffish about committing, I'd honestly move on. Sucks, I know, but it'll save you so much drama and heartache later on.
From a guy's point of view, if I'm deliberately not committing to a woman, I'm keeping my options open.
So... yeah. I feel for you. This stuff can really suck sometimes just like it can be the most awesome-est thing EVAR.
Hope that helps.
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